> be Linus Torvalds
> grow up in Finland, realize there's more to life than saunas and reindeer
> stumble upon UNIX, fall in love but broke as a joke
> say "screw it" and decide to make your own Kernel
> announce Linux on some obscure mailing list, who reads those anyway?
> surprise, a few enlightened souls do
> they start contributing, but not without Linus' "quality control"
> you don't like GPL? tough luck, kiddo, Linus loves it
> Windows is for normies who can't handle a terminal
> macOS is for those too artsy to understand a real OS
> Linux begins to take over servers, because it doesn't suck
> you're not using Linux? you must be one of those NPCs
> only true 200IQ programmers dare contribute to the Kernel
> Richard Stallman? yeah, he's cool, but it's LINUX, not GNU/Linux
> Linus gets mad at bad code, rants in mailing lists, becomes legendary
> he doesn't have time for your lackluster contributions
> GitHub? More like TrashHub for mediocre devs
> continues to insult anyone who writes crappy code, because life's too short
> takes a break to think about being nice, realizes it's overrated
> comes back, Linux still king, open source still the only way
> if you're not running Linux, what are you even doing with your life?
> Linus Torvalds, the rude genius who gave us Linux, keeps mic-dropping
> Windows users still confused, Linux users still enlightened
> end of story, go install Linux or remain a normie forever